Q&A: Should I Share How I’m Feeling?
Q: Basically in March I am going to hang out with this guy that I’ve met twice before. Both times we’ve had such a good fun time! but they’ve always been quick and short visits (just a few hours). So anyways, I’m flying out to visit in March for the weekend. I guess I felt that when i first got my ticket there was a lot more excitement, then i started to feel that his emails were a little short, but that there’s still some excitement there, but i still would want to hear more from him, especially if i’ve asked him a question or whatever.
Things like this make me ask the following:
is it wrong to give a guy equal amount of attention? Is it wrong to be on the same page as a guy is? do guys always want the chase?
I don’t like to tell a guy what’s really on my mind (like hey why are your emails so damn short? so I am coming out, what does this mean), etc….some talk (the serious conversations) are just better left kept outside the conversation. If it comes up hey that’s great, if not talking about somethings can be a turn off. am i right?
So the past two days, I kind of took my time in replying back to him, took my “into him” tone a notch down and today I got a much better reply from him. telling me that he keeps thinking about all the time that we will have to spend together (especially at night time) and all this thinking is keeping him horny, what have i done to him? …then he went on to tell me more about his day.
my ideal response would want to also be on the same page as him, because this is how i’m feeling. but i guess i get torn in what is over doing it? how much excitement do you share in which you keep the guy interested and wanting more?
I hate having to put so much thought into these things, why can’t i just say what’s on my mind?
A:
>>>is it wrong to give a guy equal amount of attention? Is it wrong to be on the same page as a guy is? do guys always want the chase?
You should only give the guy as much attention as he can handle without getting turned off. Some guys need to feel like they are losing the girl constantly in order to maintain interest. I am NOT one of those guys and all my girls text me constantly and tell me how much they miss me, etc. This doesn’t affect my attraction for them but sadly, for some guys it does.
>>>I don’t like to tell a guy what’s really on my mind (like hey why are your emails so damn short? so I am coming out, what does this mean), etc….some talk (the serious conversations) are just better left kept outside the conversation. If it comes up hey that’s great, if not talking about somethings can be a turn off. am i right?
Yeah, it’s not a good idea to have serious conversations about this stuff. Its a turn off because it takes all the mystery and spark out of the interaction… you will feel that it is gone as well, which is funny because girls do these things… guys fall into the trap of responding the way the girl wants… and then all off a sudden, the girl realizes she no longer feels the same way as before. lol It’s a quirk of human nature.
>>>So the past two days, I kind of took my time in replying back to him, took my “into him” tone a notch down and today I got a much better reply from him. telling me that he keeps thinking about all the time that we will have to spend together (especially at night time) and all this thinking is keeping him horney, what have i done to him? …then he went on to tell me more about his day.
Well, I guess this is the kind of guy that responds when women pull back a bit. Now you know what to do when he doesnt show you enough attention.
>>>my ideal response would want to also be on the same page as him, because this is how i’m feeling. but i guess i get torn in what is over doing it? how much excitement do you share in which you keep the guy interested and wanting more?
Dont be on the same page with this guy…. be about a page behind him, so to speak. But at the same time, you want to reward him every time he does something you like… so when he shows you a lot of attention, just nonchalantly say, “I love it when you say X to me… that makes me feel really good, etc.” This will help ensure that you will receive more of this behavior in the future.
>>>I hate having to put so much thought into these things, why can’t i just say what’s on my mind?
Because it’s always a game on some level. Even when you are married. 
-Jay Cataldo
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